Lately, as the world around us seems to become more and more complicated and threatening, and we are made ever more aware of all the terrible suffering, it might be harder than ever to let ourselves feel good. There is a palpable societal frequency, and it takes courage to consciously choose a different one. Being social creatures, we want to feel assurance of our acceptance and belonging. Primal emotions are attached to this desire.
So what do we do when the pervasive societal frequency vibrates with negativity, discouragement, exhaustion, anxiety and fear? If we aren’t especially self-aware and vigilant, we will likely find ourselves becoming unconsciously tuned to that same frequency, whether we enjoy that ‘station’ or not. To continue the metaphor, if you don’t like what you hear on a particular radio station, you simply reach out and move the dial until you find something that matches your current state. If you are feeling upbeat, you might choose upbeat sing-along music; if you are feeling serious, you might choose a news station; and if you are feeling blue, you might choose some sad or soothing music. Or, you might choose happy music when you feel sad, in an intentional attempt to raise your vibration.
Why is this vibrational tuning so much harder to choose in our moment-by-moment bigger-picture life? I think it’s partly due to our hard-wired, primal need to fit into the group, and partly due to the emotional baggage most of us lug around, that gives us constant messages about what we do or don’t deserve to feel and experience. If matching your tone to the suffering of the world genuinely causes you to lovingly step into effective action for positive change, then perhaps it has a legitimate place.
These past few years have provided such a dramatic landscape in which it has been fascinating to watch the above issues play themselves out. Social researchers discovered long ago that roughly 1/3 of the population will be compelled to follow their own instincts even if it costs them the approval of close friends, family, or an authority figure, or a secure place in ‘the group.’ This doesn’t mean that those people don’t want to belong or receive approval, just that it isn’t ultimately their highest priority. For the other 2/3’s, belonging to the group is paramount, and they may even go along with things that they question inwardly, rather than risk exclusion or disapproval from the group.
I’m sure that by now, after the intense shake-down of the past 4 years, we have all noticed where our own priority lies. And we are either comfortable or uncomfortable with that realization. It’s all good - we are all ONE - and society thrives on our expressions of diversity and contrast. What I see as important, is that each individual become fully aware of their ability to consciously CHOOSE their path, and the frequency to which they wish to tune themselves, moment by moment and day by day. Being on unconscious ‘auto-pilot,’ and just going along out of generalized fear or insecurity, does no one any good.
Sometimes, needing to belong, or to be pleasing to others, or to be consistent with a habitual negative sense of self, becomes a convenient excuse to avoid rising into our full potential. For example, as a health mentor I have often heard the excuse that it is ‘too hard,’ or even ‘impossible’ to adopt a healthy raw vegan diet when a spouse or other family members in the home are eating the standard diet, or expecting you to prepare it for them. The truth is, it is only too hard for the person whose ultimate priority is to fit in, to be cooperative, or to maintain the status quo.
You may have heard me quote Dr. Michael Bernard Beckwith in saying, “Pain pushes until a vision pulls.” I recently came across another version of this idea, from Gay Hendricks:
“There’s only one way to get through the fog of fear, and that’s to transform it into the clarity of exhilaration.”
What does this mean? To me, it means that when you can see most of your fear as an indication that something new is trying to break through into your awareness - or an invitation for you to move beyond your comfort zone - you are on your way to tuning yourself to the frequency of INSPIRATION, which then becomes your segue to the ‘clarity of exhilaration.’
Here are some very powerful questions that Gay Hendricks poses in his classic book, which I highly recommend, called “The Big Leap”:
Am I willing to increase the amount of time every day that I feel good inside?
Am I willing to increase the amount of time that my whole life goes well?
Am I willing to increase the amount of time every day that I feel pain-free?
How much love and abundance am I willing to allow?
Pay attention to your immediate response to these questions. What sensations do you feel in your body when you ask each one out loud to yourself? Do you feel an easy, exhilarating, full-blooded “YES!” Or do you experience an uneasy or anxious sense of resistance or defended-ness? Are you tempted to explain yourself with “Yes, but…..”? I invite you to simply notice, and then just keep asking the questions day after day, and watch for a shift.
You may wish to engage with your journal on a self-inquiry around any resistance you may encounter with these questions. What beliefs or internal messaging is in the way of you giving yourself wholehearted PERMISSION to feel good, to allow your life to flow well consistently, to release pain, and to welcome abundance on every level of your life? Why do you hold onto these self-punitive messages and beliefs? Why do you need to ‘balance’ the good that flows into your life with something else that feels bad? Try to engage in this self-inquiry from a place of honest curiosity, and with self-compassion instead of judgment or self-criticism.
Seeing where any resistance comes from is very helpful, because once a belief is identified, it can be consciously deleted and replaced with a higher form. I know that your true Self desires to feel good, and to thrive in a pain-free life of love and abundance! Every one of us possesses the power to choose our go-to favorite frequency, and to keep tuning into it. But we do have to re-claim this power, which for most people has slowly, subtly, slipped from our grasp over time, as we have been immersed in overwhelmingly disempowering societal messaging. And we do need to take full responsibility for what go-to favorite spot on the dial that we are choosing - are we choosing out of comfortable habit? Or are we willing to choose for what our natural highest Self truly desires?
The important message here, is that it’s up to YOU. You cannot control or predict all of the external situations and circumstances of your life and the world around you, nor the majority societal response, but you do have the power to choose your response, and the vibrational tone or frequency that you wish to match. Have you ever deeply pondered what good it does for you to match, or dwell in, the negative frequencies in the world? Does this prove that you are a sensitive and caring person? Are you able to effectively make a positive difference in the world from this energetic frequency? What contribution might be possible if you were to re-claim your natural, innately grounded frequency of love, peace, joy, compassion and generosity?
What if each one of us were to find our way to return home to the vibrant, feel-good path of the naturally ever-upward spiraling flow of the benevolent universe? I hope you will conquer your fears by finding your exhilarating inspiration, and give yourself permission to enjoy the ride, while radiating the frequencies that naturally make the world a happier place :).
Our bodies always seek comfort and our minds are wired for bliss. 🔥 Love you!
Maybe this one should have been titled "YES"! Haha